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Eggcellent Easter insights

Recently, I encountered a compelling analogy of the distinction between Anxiety and Depression. 

Man driving in car anxiety
Anxiety express

Consider yourself driving a car: 

Depression sits firmly in the rearview mirror, tethered to past events and the persistent "what if's". 

Anxiety is looming ahead of future anticipated events. 

I will never look at Maccas' billboards the same again...!

🐺 ManPack 24 update 🐺

As part of the 'ManPack 24' package, I am pleased to announce for participants who sign up will receive (minimum) two hours of 1:1 pre and post Retreat sessions. 

Two uninterrupted hours for you: 

  1. Pre-Reset Retreat: A 1:1 session with me to discuss the upcoming retreat and ensure you are set for the 2.5 days of reset, hiking, yoga, meditation, fun, laughter, man-ness, and campfire gathering. Just you and me. 

  2. Post-Reset Retreat: A 1:1 coffee with me at your local cafe to check in on your progress. Just you and me. And the goats milk decaffe magic Mocha. 

Blokes don't need the fancy notebooks and trinkets. We need quality time to talk, off the grid, to talk without the hoo-hah. Quality bloke time. 

Quality chat time

You want 1:1 time? You got it. 👊

It''s behind me isn't it?

Imposter demon

It lurks. It lingers. It silently watches. Waiting.

My father on occasion would tell me "Nick, you are your own worst enemy...". Dad always knew me better than I knew myself. 

Our inner coach turns dark critic very quickly.

Some of its best hits on my internal playlist include:

  • "You idiot!" which rockets to Number 1 on the Mairy Top 40, almost daily

  • "FFS, you moron! What a crap shot!" number 1 on Saturday golf comp charts

  • "I am not good enough to do this..."

  • "They will not get any value from my posts"

  • "I will fail"

I think you see my point. The oooool' Nickoffski is my imposter demon, critic, and anti-Nick. He is relentless!

My tonic when I hear this? Breathe. One very deep breath. Focus on the light and my surrounds. The restored energy flows out from my chest. 

Simple. Yet, it keeps Nickoffski at bay when he appears in front of me after lurking for a while. The breath escorts him back to the holding cell. 

He is right behind me now as I type. I see him. I acknowledge him. But I am not listening as I pump the tunes in my headphones. 

How do you quieten your inner critic? Your demon? Would love to hear how you quieten the beast within. 

This week's Top 10 Krispy Kreme's of self-love

  1. Your Own Friend: You are your own best friend and cheerleader. Are you conscious of your self talk and compassion - if no compassion there, find it. ChatGPT it if you have to - you are worthy of your own support. As a good friend once said to me "Nick, there are people in the world ready to talk you down; don't be one of them!" Thank you Jamie Paterson !

  2. Your strengths: Think of your strengths and place a post-it note of them, or just pick one and place it next to your screen. Or, make it your wallpaper on your phone (as I am betting you maaaay check your phone at least once or 391 times every hour.)

  3. Your easy goal:  Just a small goal for today, and this week. Small, achievable goal. This week mine is practice golf putting 3 times. 

  4. Your person: Find YOUR person. The one who sparks that joy inside and text or call them to say hi. It is amazing what hearing your person's voice can do for your soul. 

  5. Your thing: What is that one thing that is YOUR THING? Reading a book? Bubble bath? Listening to music? Walking the pooch? Flash date night? Selfcare is essential in recharging yourself and feel betterer. 

  6. Your demon: Challenge that demon who talks, like what I said above. Challenge it, acknowledge, then throw it away into your imaginary firepit.

  7. Your forgiveness: Anything you have done and you feel bad about, forgive yourself for it. Harder than it sounds. But try it. Maybe write it down on some paper and literally burn it, or flush it down the dunny. 

  8. Your gratitude: I wont bore you with something which has been written about all over LinkedIn. Ask a friend to start a daily, yes, DAILY, gratitude habit with you. I have two friends I do this with everyday. Helps! Trust me. 

  9. Your boundaries: Again, lots written about this, but, the art of saying no is essential to protect your own space, time, and wellbeing. If something doesn't work for you, or you have to compromise your own wellbeing, then no it is. 

  10. Your tribe: Who is in your tribe of support? This includes professionals. Start with an online chat service on Beyond Blue or Lifeline. It is free. Or, check-in with your GP to get a mental health plan to offset the cost of a Psychologist or Psychiatrist. Talking is essential, so maybe explore the options and find a way to talk it out. Phoning a friend is also a wonderful starting point. 

Man O'Clock Show update ⏰

We are recording a new episode today which will be released next week. An incredible soul with lived experience and an A-lister in the world of writing and supporting men with their mental health. A wonderful woman. 

Stay tuned! 

Silently suffering 

Lonely man depression
Silently suffering

It is commonly known that we as humans tend to suffer in silence when it comes to our mental health. 

"Oh I have felt like this for a very long time and felt too embarrassed to open up about it" 

If something is gnawing away at you, and it has been for a while, chances are it will be like a cicada

Cicadas spend most of their life underground. It has been suggested that some of the large, common Australian species of cicada may live underground as nymphs for around 6-7 years. (Australian Museum)

We bury it. Deep. Yet it festers. It grows. It builds into something, then BAM, out in the open it comes. 

Sometimes it is a relief, whilst other times, it has consequences. 

Some examples of cicadas include; 

  • Inability to talk about finances to your spouse

  • Lost contact with best friend

  • Guilt with a past argument

  • Ignoring niggling health concern

  • Staying in a role/company which doesn't respect your value

  • Remaining in an unhealthy toxic relationship

  • Putting needs of others first regularly

  • Accepting continual poor behaviour towards you

  • .....and the list goes on!

Cicadas grow and thrive when buried deep. They feed off guilt, lack of acknowledgment, and indecision to talk about, or even act on, them.

Dig them up. 

Get them out into the open. Talk to a trusted friend, or professional is a great way to start to give these cicadas sunlight and reduce their impact on your mental health. 

Let me know how you go, yeah?

Happy Easter holidays! 🐣

Now, this is very, very important.

Do me a favour. Well, do YOU a favour. 

Prioritise some you-time this holiday weekend. Doesn't have to be a huge chunk of the weekend, but be sure to indulge some quality time alone with yourself, if possible. 

Maybe get up extra early, or go to bed later when the family are in bed, and get some of that you-time goodness! 

But, I don't know what to do....

Oooooh yes you do. 

  1. Read your favourite book from childhood (You're a wizard, Harry...)

  2. Quick walk with your headphones listening to your favourite boy band.

  3. Put on Headspace meditation app whilst falling asleep

  4. Have a COLD beer/wine/water in the hot shower - OMG I LOVE THIS!

  5. Call a family member who you haven't spoken to for a while

  6. Book your seat on Man Pack 24......#gratuitous-plug

  7. Write a letter to your inner child (harder than you think!)

  8. Clean out a cupboard you have been meaning to do for a while with music on LOUD!

  9. As it is Easter and it is bound to rain, make a tiny boat from a leaf and have a boat race against your kids on the run-off in the street gutter (watch for cars and stand on the nature strip!)

  10. Get that chocolate bar you used to have as a kid - hello Crunchie! 

Hopefully that helps. Just be sure to do something for YOU in amongst looking after everyone else this Easter. 🐰

⚠️ Remember ⚠️

As always, if you need to talk, chat, cry, vent, decompress, or whatever, know that I am only a phone call away, or so many other organisations like below who are willing and able to support you.

You. Are. Not. Alone.

If you need someone to talk to, call:

  • Lifeline on 13 11 14

  • Kids Helpline on 1800 551 800

  • MensLine Australia on 1300 789 978

  • Suicide Call Back Service on 1300 659 467

  • Beyond Blue on 1300 22 46 36

  • Headspace on 1800 650 890

  • QLife on 1800 184 527

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